Hi. I'm Nij Dey!
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You’re probably here to see if I’m a real person, and yes, I promise I’m not an AI or a bot. Just a human who’s passionate about helping people heal and grow. Maybe you’re here because you’re curious, or maybe because something in my work spoke to you. Either way, welcome. If you’d like to know more about who I am and why I do this, keep reading to see my story.
Hi. I'm Nij Dey!
You’re probably here to see if I’m a real person, and yes, I promise I’m not an AI or a bot. Just a human who’s passionate about helping people heal and grow. Maybe you’re here because you’re curious, or maybe because something in my work spoke to you. Either way, welcome. If you’d like to know more about who I am and why I do this, keep reading to see my story.
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MY STORY: THE DAY I STOPPED LIVING SOMEONE ELSE’S LIFE
Today, I’m a motivational speaker, relationship coach, and certified hypnotherapist — but my journey here was far from straightforward.
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Growing up in a traditional British Indian household, the choices felt clear: doctor or engineer. Since I couldn’t stand the sight of blood, engineering became the path I followed, and I spent nearly two decades building a career in software. On the outside, everything looked settled. But inside, there was always a deeper pull, a calling to help people in a meaningful way.
Even while working full-time, evenings and weekends were spent running workshops, coaching individuals, and practicing hypnotherapy. Witnessing people transform, seeing them reclaim strength and confidence, sparked something in me that engineering never could.
Then, just before COVID, after 18 years in software engineering, I made the leap. I left that career behind and committed myself fully to coaching and therapy, following the path that had been calling all along.
Today, I’m a motivational speaker, relationship coach, and certified hypnotherapist — but my journey here was far from straightforward.
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Growing up in a traditional British Indian household, the choices felt clear: doctor or engineer. Since I couldn’t stand the sight of blood, engineering became the path I followed, and I spent nearly two decades building a career in software. On the outside, everything looked settled. But inside, there was always a deeper pull, a calling to help people in a meaningful way.
Even while working full-time, evenings and weekends were spent running workshops, coaching individuals, and practicing hypnotherapy. Witnessing people transform, seeing them reclaim strength and confidence, sparked something in me that engineering never could.
Then, just before COVID, after 18 years in software engineering, I made the leap. I left that career behind and committed myself fully to coaching and therapy, following the path that had been calling all along.
But before I ever became a coach or therapist, I was a child carrying a weight so heavy that I once wanted life to end.
The roots of my work run far deeper than a career change. By the age of 10, experiences of childhood trauma, bullying, and loneliness had left deep scars, which over the years grew into depression, self-hatred, and low self-esteem.
Through therapy and personal growth, I slowly rebuilt myself. From someone who once struggled to get out of bed, I became someone who now guides others out of their darkest moments. From hating myself, I learned to truly appreciate who I am. From feeling worthless, I learned to live with clarity, confidence, and hope.
This is why I do what I do today. Brokenness is not the end of the story. Healing is possible, and transformation is real.
But before I ever became a coach or therapist, I was a child carrying a weight so heavy that I once wanted life to end.
The roots of my work run far deeper than a career change. By the age of 10, experiences of childhood trauma, bullying, and loneliness had left deep scars, which over the years grew into depression, self-hatred, and low self-esteem.
Through therapy and personal growth, I slowly rebuilt myself. From someone who once struggled to get out of bed, I became someone who now guides others out of their darkest moments. From hating myself, I learned to truly appreciate who I am. From feeling worthless, I learned to live with clarity, confidence, and hope.
This is why I do what I do today. Brokenness is not the end of the story. Healing is possible, and transformation is real.
THE WEIGHT I CARRIED THAT ALMOST CRUSHED ME
THE WEIGHT I CARRIED THAT ALMOST CRUSHED ME
Trauma leaves marks that aren’t always visible, but they shape how we feel every day.
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I know what it’s like to carry that weight, to feel stuck, alone, and unsure if things could ever get better. As a child, I experienced bullying, loneliness, and experiences that left me questioning my own worth. For years, that pain grew into self-doubt, low self-esteem, and a feeling that I was just broken.
It wasn’t until I committed to therapy and personal growth that I began to understand what healing could actually look like. Step by step, I learned how to release old wounds, stop repeating harmful patterns, and build a sense of inner strength I didn’t know I had. That journey changed everything for me and it shapes the work I do today.
I became a trauma therapist because I wanted to be the person I wished I had when I was younger, someone to guide me through the darkness, listen without judgment, and remind me that hope is possible. I know how heavy it can feel to carry pain alone and I also know that change is possible, even when it feels impossible.
Now, I help others walk that same path. Together we focus on letting go of the past, breaking free from destructive patterns, and rediscovering the strength, clarity, and purpose that has been there all along. Healing doesn’t have to happen in isolation. There is a way forward and you do not have to walk it alone.
Trauma leaves marks that aren’t always visible, but they shape how we feel every day.
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I know what it’s like to carry that weight, to feel stuck, alone, and unsure if things could ever get better. As a child, I experienced bullying, loneliness, and experiences that left me questioning my own worth. For years, that pain grew into self-doubt, low self-esteem, and a feeling that I was just broken.
It wasn’t until I committed to therapy and personal growth that I began to understand what healing could actually look like. Step by step, I learned how to release old wounds, stop repeating harmful patterns, and build a sense of inner strength I didn’t know I had. That journey changed everything for me and it shapes the work I do today.
I became a trauma therapist because I wanted to be the person I wished I had when I was younger, someone to guide me through the darkness, listen without judgment, and remind me that hope is possible. I know how heavy it can feel to carry pain alone and I also know that change is possible, even when it feels impossible.
Now, I help others walk that same path. Together we focus on letting go of the past, breaking free from destructive patterns, and rediscovering the strength, clarity, and purpose that has been there all along. Healing doesn’t have to happen in isolation. There is a way forward and you do not have to walk it alone.
THE SHOCKING REASON MY RELATIONSHIPS ALWAYS FELL APART
THE SHOCKING REASON MY RELATIONSHIPS ALWAYS FELL APART
The first time I got into a serious relationship, it was the first time I truly felt loved and somewhat secure.
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It was a feeling I had never known before, and it left a deep impression on me. But when that relationship ended, I was completely devastated. I couldn’t understand why it had fallen apart, and I felt lost.
Over the years, I went through one difficult relationship after another, repeating patterns I didn’t fully understand. Slowly, I realized the challenges weren’t always about my partners - the patterns were within me. That realization became the start of a journey of self-discovery, healing, and personal growth that shaped who I am today.
Through therapy, coaching, and years of consistent inner work, I learned to build a healthier sense of self and develop the tools to create strong, lasting connections. I eventually met my wife, and we’ve now been married for over 15 years. The first year wasn’t easy, I was still working through old wounds, but through patience, self-awareness, and continued growth, our marriage strengthened, and it continues to thrive today.
Experiencing this transformation firsthand showed me how past wounds and unhealed patterns can affect relationships and that change is possible. I have since helped many marriages and guided individuals to break destructive cycles. Using psychology, hypnotherapy, and practical relationship coaching, I support people in creating healthier, more fulfilling connections.
The first time I got into a serious relationship, it was the first time I truly felt loved and somewhat secure.
It was a feeling I had never known before, and it left a deep impression on me. But when that relationship ended, I was completely devastated. I couldn’t understand why it had fallen apart, and I felt lost.
Over the years, I went through one difficult relationship after another, repeating patterns I didn’t fully understand. Slowly, I realized the challenges weren’t always about my partners - the patterns were within me. That realization became the start of a journey of self-discovery, healing, and personal growth that shaped who I am today.
Through therapy, coaching, and years of consistent inner work, I learned to build a healthier sense of self and develop the tools to create strong, lasting connections. I eventually met my wife, and we’ve now been married for over 15 years. The first year wasn’t easy, I was still working through old wounds, but through patience, self-awareness, and continued growth, our marriage strengthened, and it continues to thrive today.
Experiencing this transformation firsthand showed me how past wounds and unhealed patterns can affect relationships and that change is possible. I have since helped many marriages and guided individuals to break destructive cycles. Using psychology, hypnotherapy, and practical relationship coaching, I support people in creating healthier, more fulfilling connections.
HOW CORPORATE SUCCESS STARTED SAVING LIVES
HOW CORPORATE SUCCESS STARTED SAVING LIVES
What started with leading talks, workshops, and seminars soon became a mission: to use my skills and experience to truly impact lives.
Since 1999, I’ve been on a journey in the corporate world that turned out to be far more than a career. I realized early on that success in business isn’t just about numbers, strategies, or climbing the ladder. True success is about helping people thrive, building resilience, and giving them the tools to navigate life’s pressures, both at work and beyond.
Combining my expertise as a relationship coach and certified hypnotherapist with corporate training, I began helping individuals manage stress, rebuild confidence, and overcome challenges that often went unseen. Over time, I watched people transform in ways I hadn’t expected: a leader struggling with burnout learned to reclaim control and purpose, a team mired in conflict began communicating with clarity and empathy, and individuals weighed down by self-doubt found strength they didn’t know they had.
Through workshops on emotional intelligence, building resilience, conflict management, developing healthy self-esteem, meditation, overcoming procrastination, and more, I saw that the tools I shared didn’t just improve performance, they changed lives. People walked out of sessions with renewed hope, energy, and the ability to face challenges that once felt impossible.
This is why I say that my corporate journey “started saving lives.” It wasn’t about climbing the ladder—it was about lifting people up, helping them heal, and giving them the strategies to thrive not only in their careers but in their personal lives as well. The work I do now is a testament to the power of combining professional skills with heart, empathy, and the courage to guide others through transformation.
What started with leading talks, workshops, and seminars soon became a mission: to use my skills and experience to truly impact lives.
Since 1999, I’ve been on a journey in the corporate world that turned out to be far more than a career. I realized early on that success in business isn’t just about numbers, strategies, or climbing the ladder. True success is about helping people thrive, building resilience, and giving them the tools to navigate life’s pressures, both at work and beyond.
Combining my expertise as a relationship coach and certified hypnotherapist with corporate training, I began helping individuals manage stress, rebuild confidence, and overcome challenges that often went unseen. Over time, I watched people transform in ways I hadn’t expected: a leader struggling with burnout learned to reclaim control and purpose, a team mired in conflict began communicating with clarity and empathy, and individuals weighed down by self-doubt found strength they didn’t know they had.
Through workshops on emotional intelligence, building resilience, conflict management, developing healthy self-esteem, meditation, overcoming procrastination, and more, I saw that the tools I shared didn’t just improve performance, they changed lives. People walked out of sessions with renewed hope, energy, and the ability to face challenges that once felt impossible.
This is why I say that my corporate journey “started saving lives.” It wasn’t about climbing the ladder—it was about lifting people up, helping them heal, and giving them the strategies to thrive not only in their careers but in their personal lives as well. The work I do now is a testament to the power of combining professional skills with heart, empathy, and the courage to guide others through transformation.
I believe there are 2 aspects to raising your game:
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1) Embedding - creating new thought patterns and behaviours, and
2) Shedding - removing the inner resistance, especially from the past.
Think of it like driving a car. To move forward, you need to press the accelerator and release the brakes. Embedding helps you accelerate, while shedding lets you move without restraint. Through tailored programs, I guide clients through both, helping them step into a higher level of personal and professional growth.
At the heart of it all is this principle: to raise the quality of your life, you need to raise the quality of your consciousness. That’s what I do with my clients — retrain the brain to create lasting change and help them truly raise their game.
I believe there are 2 aspects to raising your game:
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1) Embedding - creating new thought patterns and behaviours, and
2) Shedding - removing the inner resistance, especially from the past.
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Think of it like driving a car. To move forward, you need to press the accelerator and release the brakes. Embedding helps you accelerate, while shedding lets you move without restraint. Through tailored programs, I guide clients through both, helping them step into a higher level of personal and professional growth.
At the heart of it all is this principle: to raise the quality of your life, you need to raise the quality of your consciousness. That’s what I do with my clients — retrain the brain to create lasting change and help them truly raise their game.
My Motto
"Heal the past, and recreate your future."
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A lot of the time, when we're stuck or procrastinating, whether it's work/career related, or our romantic relationship, or even our health goals, the real reason is deeper than just laziness or superficial fear. When we keep going round the same cycle over and over, it often means that we need to heal something from the past. That's how we create a new future! It's exciting to know that we can thrive - not just survive - when we heal our past.
